You're watching that scene again. The scene where Tom finally realises his expectations will never align with reality. The scene where his world gets erased. The scene where he has to redraw everything from scratch.
You remember your expectations for this Christmas and how you should finally realise the same thing as Tom. Your expectations will never align with reality. You should just let them go. At least you will never be disappointed again.
You remember you had said that to someone. You regret it. You didn't say it to express an opinion but to make that person feel bad. But they're not the ones who should feel bad. It's not their fault you had such high hopes. It's yours. You raised your expectations to that point. No one else. When will you realise expectations shouldn't be taken seriously?
"You should hope for the best and expect the worse". That's what your friend had said. She was right. That's what you should do. Hope for the best but not expect it. Never. You know if you expect the worse you protect yourself from so much. Heartache, disappointment, even fear, because how can you be afraid of something you expect? You get used to the idea, you prepare for the worst. If you prepare for the worst anything else that happens will seem good.
Once again you think of what you had expected your Christmas to be like. God! How could you have been so optimistic? This isn't the first time. You knew it wouldn't be like that. You knew Christmas would be just another day. Something dull. Maybe richer food.
Christmas is a tale. A tale told to children. But don't you know by now that tales are for children? Beings who haven't fully developed a conscience. Not for you. You've grown up. Tales are just tales. Why should this tale be any different? Because it's religious? Marx said "Religion is the opium of the people". Couldn't we say that "tales are the opium of the people"? Because what is religion if not a mass of tales? And what our expectations? Tales. Created by us. For our own pleasure. A self-induced opium if you'd like. Why did Tom's world fall apart when his expectations shattered to pieces? Because we need opium. It helps us go on with our lives, keeps us from falling apart, gives us hope.
You love this scene. It shows something that everyone should realise but not many people do. You hear Regina Spektor singing as Tom's expectations are dismanteled. "I'm the hero of the story don't need to be saved". You chuckle. That's ironic, you think. You're just being saved by your own expectations. Drawing further away from them. Being saved by reality. Another chuckle. That's even more ironic. Being saved by reality when it is what most people fear. You should fear it though. That's what's ironic. You should fear what will save you. After all, aren't our expectations better than reality? Isn't that why we have expectations? As I said before, it's a self-induced opium. An opium we need. More than anything.
After this movie, you'll have a song stuck in your head. A song by the Smiths. An incredible band. "To die by your side is such a heavenly way to die". Indeed it is, you think. But that's expecting the best.
Sometimes, you do expect the worst about your life. Sometimes you don't just expect it. You know. You can feel it. Somehow. But you still imagine that bright future ahead of you. The one that everyone tells you you have. After all, you have fairly good grades, you know things. And you know something now better than anything. You will never escape high expectations.
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